What should I ask my brother?

Ask what he remembers about your parents, what he got away with, what he took the blame for, and what he wants from the years ahead.

We are not close. Is this worth doing?

Often it is exactly the thing that helps. Written questions ask without pressure and can be answered at a distance.

How do we collect the answers?

Go Family Story emails three questions a week by private link and keeps every answer in one shared family archive.

Questions to ask your brother

Brothers tend to talk about everything except themselves. These questions go where ordinary conversation does not: your parents, your childhood, and what he has carried since.

Questions to ask your brother about his own life

Ask these directly, or send a few at a time in writing.

1.What was it like being a boy in our family?
2.What did we share that nobody else got to see?
3.What was the worst fight we ever had?
4.What phrase did you get from your parents without noticing?
5.When did we stop being children together?
6.What do you wish we had done differently as brothers?
7.What do we both do that is pure family?
8.What has got easier with age?
9.What would you want said about us as brothers?
10.What did you carry for the family that nobody thanked you for?
11.Which of our family stories do you tell other people?
12.What do you want playing in the room when you are remembered?
13.What do you hope we still do together?
14.What was our house like when we were small?
15.What did our parents seem like to you then?
16.What stories were told again and again in your family?
17.What did we do together when nobody was watching?
18.What did we fight about, and who usually won?
19.What trouble did we get into together?
20.What is the naughtiest thing you ever did?
21.What was mealtime like in our house?
22.What did holidays look like for us?
23.What is the funniest thing that ever happened between us?
24.What did you spend your first wages on?
25.When did we grow apart, if we did, and why?
26.What brought us back together?
27.What was the hardest thing our family went through?
28.What was your first date like?
29.How did that change you?
30.What did our parents give you that you carry?
31.What did they get wrong, in your view?
32.What did you want to give your children that you never had?
33.What do you wish we had done differently as brother and sister?
34.What do you want our children to know about us?
35.What family story must never be lost?
36.What is the biggest risk you took?
37.What was your place in the family, and did you choose it?
38.What did we fight about most?
39.What did we do together that nobody else knew about?
40.What is your idea of a perfect ordinary day?
41.What was hardest about growing up in our family?
42.What changed between us when we left home?
43.What do you think our childhood did to you?
44.What are you better at than you let on?
45.What do you wish we had talked about years ago?

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We send the questions for you. They answer free from their inbox, and every answer, photo and recording is gathered into one private archive — kept on a highly secure database, and downloadable by you at any time.

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Questions to answer about your brother

Write down what you remember of him. Nobody else saw those years from your side.

46.What is he like as a boy in your house?
47.What did the two of you do together that your parents never knew about?
48.What did he borrow and never give back?
49.What do you wish they understood about themselves?
50.What did he get away with that you never could?
51.What does he protect you from?
52.What do you envy about him?
53.What do you think of them at the very beginning?
54.Who was he at school, and who was he at home?
55.What does he want his life to look like?
56.What was the worst argument the two of you had?
57.What do their laugh sound like?
58.When do the two of you become friends rather than siblings?
59.What does he understand about your family that nobody else does?
60.What does he do that is exactly like your mother or father?
61.Where do you spend the most time together?
62.What has he carries for the family?
63.What is he like to have on your side?
64.What does he find hard to talk about?
65.What are they like under pressure?

Collect the answers in one place

Go Family Story sends three of these questions a week by private link. The person answers with a free account, and every answer, photo, video and voice recording is kept in one private archive that only your family can see.

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Common questions

What should I ask my brother?: Ask what he remembers about your parents, what he got away with, what he took the blame for, and what he wants from the years ahead.
We are not close. Is this worth doing?: Often it is exactly the thing that helps. Written questions ask without pressure and can be answered at a distance.
How do we collect the answers?: Go Family Story emails three questions a week by private link and keeps every answer in one shared family archive.